My Thirty Day Journey: Day 27

A touchy subject, something I almost want to scream at everyone.

False friendships.  I actually have a male friends who had an issue with friendships, particularly female friendships and it honestly bugs me seeing how shitty he is treated and he doesn’t realize that most of them don’t care about them.  Friends don’t treat each other that way.  Female are often a complex being and I see so often that people excuse their bad behavior for them being them, it’s their time of month, women are just gossipy, ect.  It’s bullshit, don’t let a women treat you like trash!

If she isn’t getting to know you and only complains to you, she doesn’t care about you.  Friendships, especially with emotional and mentally strong women, are a wonderful thing because to me I always feel like women dig a little deeper than men.  I myself have always found women get to know me quick than men every time and I have had a multitude of friends from gay to straight.  Like any normal functioning friendship though people get to know each other, they talk bout their life and what new things they are planning to do but it’s equal.  Often you’ll meet the toxic she-devils though who don’t make it equal they only come and complain and talk about them and they don’t give a flying fuck about your life.  They just want to use you as a dumping site and when they’re done they’re gone.  Trust me when I say you’re not  garbage can, you’re a human being.

If she can go from sweet to completely insulting, she doesn’t care about you.  I have seen this time and time again especially with women.  You have a female friend who is very kind towards you when she’s getting everything her way, but dare you change something or say something she doesn’t like she’ll lite a fire under your ass.  That’s not a friend, that’s a monster.  If she constantly has to pick a fight with your choices she doesn’t care about what you want or your happiness, if she sees you with a girl and she doesn’t like it and makes you feel terrible for wanting to be with somebody than she doesn’t care about you, if she shoots in form of insults that are more than just a “fuck you” than she is 100% not a friend.

She never returns a favor, advice or anything, she doesn’t care about you.  If you do something really nice for her she should do the same, that’s the nice thing to do.  I don’t mean go out and buy you a care, but maybe you write her a nice letter or something thanking her so she goes and takes you out for a coffee.  Maybe she rants the crap out of you and you sit and listen so she makes you lunch next time you hangout.  A good friend returns the kindness, a bad friend takes and takes till you have nothing left to give.

She’s only interested in what you can offer; sex, money, advice, trips, ect.  She doesn’t care about you, she’s just using you.  This is a golden one right here, much like men women use and often I find women to use others far more than men.  Lots of women like men (and women) for what they can offer and you should never allow yourself to fall victim to this kind of treatment.  You aren’t there to hand out prizes for her.  You want someone who is there for just your company, not all the trips and luxuries she can get out of you.

She breaks promises, plans and commitments to you.  She doesn’t care about you.  Lots of times people can make booboo’s in their plans, but thats one thing and this is another.  You make plans and she cancels on you constantly she doesn’t care.  If she promises she wont do something than continues to do it anyways than she doesn’t care.  If she just simply can’t respect you, your choices and what you ask of her than she doesn’t care.  Good friends understand when you ask them not to do something because it bothers you or upsets you, they make sure that they have time for you and make sure you’re happy.

If she chews you out for making a mistake, doing something she doesn’t like or saying something she doesn’t like.  She doesn’t care about you.  This is another one that really gets at me a lot when I see it happen.  She gets upset or mad because you did something she didn’t like so she freaks out at you.  I can tell you right now a good friend would be happy for you no matter what, like say you just started dating someone if she was really a good friend to you she’d congratulate you and wish you happiness. She wouldn’t attack you over stupid stuff, that’s not friendly.

If she ignores you constantly, she doesn’t care about you.  This should actually be a tip for people in general, if someone was really important to you than you’d make time to talk and hangout.  No questions asked.  If they don’t care about you than why would they bother answering you?  They probably have better things to do and I guarantee you probably do too.  This honestly normally is one sided, most of the time you end up making most of the effort to have conversations and hangouts, this person spends little time trying to spend time with you because they just don’t want to.  You have lost your spot quickly and they’ll move on.  So should you.

Don’t let a women walk all over you just because you kinda hope she might be a good friend.  If she can’t put you 100% first in a friendship than you shouldn’t either.  Don’t waste your time especially when there are so many other people who could fill that position so much better than they could.  You deserve happy so make a happy choice, choose to pick better people who want to see you succeed and grow.

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